Updates, thanksgiving, and prayer request.

Hello blog readers,

I know that we have been noticeably silent on here lately.  And I literally have about ten minutes to update our blog before we race off to the next thing, so here is a bulleted list (I know, LAME) of what is new with us:

• Ryan is en route to Pennsylvania (as I write this) to speak at the Christian Camps and Conference Association Allegheny Sectional.
• Please be in prayer for him as he speaks.  He's feeling better, but has been battling a cold/cough for the last two weeks and when he gets into a coughing fit, it's kind of ugly.  It will not be easy for him to teach three workshops while he's got a serious tickle in his throat.
• I have started a new job at the Muskegon Area ISD.  Less drive time (woot!) and it is a counseling job.  It was sad to leave Grand Haven but I'm very excited to be doing what I'm doing, counseling students and working with the staff at the Career Tech Center.  Loving it!  I am so thankful to be doing exactly what I've always wanted to do in education, which is to be a counselor - but it has made me BUSY!
• We are in the final stages (inspections, etc.) of purchasing a new home and will hopefully be moving in a few weeks.  In case you were wondering what Ryan's big, exciting news was on Facebook a couple of weeks ago - there you have it!  We are hopefully/probably moving (barring any unforeseen problems) to the southeast side of New Era - I'm actually pretty surprised that it's not a Rothbury address.  Please pray for the sale of our current home.  If you are handy and would like to help with a few minor projects that we need to do, feel free to let us know. :)  Or if you have an overabundance of brawn and would like to help us move, that would also be most appreciated!
• We are on our way to Chicago this week (Wednesday/Thursday) to do scans and start a new chemo regimen.  We are slightly nervous about the outcome, given that there was a tumor that was growing at the last scans and we haven't had the chance yet to do anything to treat that tumor.  So we are hopeful that that is not doing too much, and we are grateful to start systemic therapy again that can target ALL of the cancer.  As always, prayer is much appreciated for that.
• Ryan is deeply involved with the writing of his letters to Colton, the book project that he and Larry Leech are working collaboratively on.  We are actually to the point where we could send sample chapters and the proposal to publishers, so that could use some major prayer.
• Colton is doing awesome and we are starting to actually think about PRESCHOOL - crazy that he could enter this fall.  We are going to hold off (we think) for another year, but it is just insane to be thinking about such things.  Wasn't he just born last week?  I guess not, seeing as how he's talking in crazy long sentences, singing, using his imagination, and cracking jokes.  I just love that boy!
• Please be in prayer for Ryan's recent symptoms, which could still be after effects of the two therasphere treatments that he did in November and January.  Fatigue, lack of appetite, and increased bilirubin levels have been the main culprits.
• Ryan just celebrated his 27th birthday three days ago!  27!  We love that number but we love 28 much, much more.  Please keep praying for Ryan to see as many birthday candles on top of a cake as possible.
• And in case you were wondering, Tigers individual game tickets go on sale March 2nd.  I'm ridiculously excited for that date to come.  We have missed baseball around here and hope to get to a few more games this year!

Well there you have it, the major update of what is going on around here.  Please know that we love you all, and we love hearing from you.  We are grateful for your prayer support and covet it in the next week especially.as we head into scans.

2 Corinthians 4: 7-18

7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8 We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9 persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 10 We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. 11 For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. 12 So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.

13 It is written: “I believed; therefore I have spoken.” Since we have that same spirit of faith, we also believe and therefore speak, 14 because we know that the one who raised the Lord Jesus from the dead will also raise us with Jesus and present us with you to himself. 15 All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God.

16 Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

The best of times and the worst of times.

"Hey Kendra, can you please proofread my blog post?"

"Sure, hon."

So as I'm reading his blog, I realize...it's almost 100% the same as what I was intending to write about.  Shucks.  This is what happens when a couple truly becomes one...they start to think the same way!  I hope that now that I think like my husband, it doesn't mean that toilet humor will start appealing to me or something.

Yes, today is April 1.  A year ago today I was just starting my spring break, and was going about with the trivialities of my day when Ryan called me with what I thought was the nastiest April Fool's Day prank I could imagine.  How I have wished so many times that it had only been a prank.  Then today we could be joking about how a year ago, he scared ten years off of my life, and I would probably playfully punch him in the shoulder.

No, this has been no joke.  This year has been the most painful experience that I could imagine.  Dreams that I had before we came to this fork in the road have been shattered or rendered dormant and God has continually showed me that right now, I am just to draw close to and wait on Him.  In the meantime, I've run from God, I've hid, I've come back to Him again, screamed at Him, cried out to Him, and thanked Him. I've been angry, I've been grateful, and I've been resentful.  There have been mountaintops of extreme joy, and there have been depths of despair that have been unlike anything I have experienced before.  Ultimately the lesson has hit home to me that it's entirely up to me what kind of attitude I will choose to have in the midst of this valley.  Will I focus my eyes on God and trust him to lead me through this muck and mire, or will I focus on myself and the things that I feel like I have a right to and just spin my proverbial wheels in the mud?

Just like Ryan's post included a list of things that he's thankful for, I too wanted to mention that in spite of the pain of this journey, God has poured out unbelievable blessings on us.  He has given us hope, promises, supporters, financial provision, protection from cancer symptoms, a stronger relationship with each other, a beautiful and happy son that gives us a smile even when things are at their toughest, and a renewed sense of purpose.  He has specifically placed us in this place at this very time to bring hope and encouragement to other people that sorely need it like we do.  This ministry that we've been blessed with...it has been unreal.  We are both in awe of the fact that God wants to use us in this way.

Pain.  Blessings.  Despair.  Opportunities.  Fear.  Hope.

It has been the best of times, and it has been the worst of times.  What a year.  However, I'm just thankful that I as I end this blog and get ready to post it, that I can look to my left and sitting five feet away from me is an incredible, "healthy", handsome, godly man to whom I am privileged to be married until death do us part.

Will you all keep praying with me that "death do us part" does not come until at least fifty years from now?

Why haven't I been posting lately? Because...

... I've been playing basketball!!!

In the last nine days I've played basketball three times and volleyball twice. This is five times as active as I have been since the week we got diagnosed over 9 months ago.

The last time I played basketball was in between when I was diagnosed and when we left for Mayo Clinic. I remember wondering if I would ever play basketball again. There were so many unknowns back then. We were hoping to go to Mayo and get a liver transplant and be done with all this within a year, but we had no idea if that would actually happen, and obviously it didn't.

Fast forward to this last Sunday. How did I play? Horribly.

I missed layups
I sucked wind
I didn't make a single shot
I barely played defense
I couldn't run, jump, or do much of anything

You know what? I have never cared less. I'm pretty competitive, so this was a foreign concept to me.

Now I just wanted to play. To lace up my sneakers, break a sweat, and feel that leather ball between my fingers. It was incredible. It was painful. Hard to tell if I was so bad and uncoordinated because of my treatments or because I haven't done anything in 8 months. Who cares.

This may seem like a small blessing to some, but it was a huge milestone and an incredible gift from God for me. There haven't been a lot of positive milestones and honestly this routine of injecting poison into my body every four weeks is starting to get old. God knew that and provided a wonderful distraction by giving me the strength to do a simple thing like play a basketball game.

God cares about me. He loves me. He provides for my needs and many of my wants. How can I complain?

Well, here's the story!

Ryan had an excellent checkup yesterday. He met with his oncologist after having had some bloodwork in the morning. That all looked great! Tumor markers are normal as they always have been, and liver enzymes are only slightly elevated in the same categories they were in November. What this means is that he's very stable and healthy, even after an extended break away from chemotherapy.

We count ourselves very blessed to hear this news. It was as good as we had hoped for. Now the next step is scans on January 24-25, and we are praying for excellent news. They will not be as extensive as last time, so we might not get as clear of a picture of what the cancer is doing.

Please pray for healing like no other. One of my good friends and I were talking recently and both of us had been prompted that very morning to pray for a healing that could only be attributed to God. Lord, there is no doubt who would get glory if Ryan is healed; it would be all for your fame.

I also want to thank the many people who commented on Facebook and on the blog here to encourage me. It has helped. In my husband's accurate assessment of my current problems, "It's been too much about Kendra trying to figure out how to control the situation and wriggle out of an impossible situation." He hit it right on the money. Have you noticed the blog posts have slowed down to a trickle? Yeah, that's not a coincidence. I have been a mess lately. Who wants to read something that a mess would write?

Anyway, I know perfectly well what I need to do. I need to humble myself before the Lord (again). I need to surrender the pitiful attempts to wrest control of a situation that is truly beyond anything that I can grasp hold of. I need to be still, and know that my God is ABLE. Somehow I lost sight of that for the past couple of months.

The good news is, at the end of this long struggle, I have a loving God that is waiting for me to come back.

And that is exactly what I choose to do.

Merry Christmas from the Prudhomme family!

Merry Christmas from the Prudhomme family! The older two of us are very tanned...we just got back from a relaxing vacation in Mexico. The youngest is contentedly playing with the new toys he got from Santa (books, letters for the bathtub, and a holster with two cap guns). I am sipping coffee and wondering how I got to be this blessed. I have a job that I love, I have a beautiful family, and the best friends imaginable. As I thought this morning, it occurred to me that I would have none of this if I did not have Jesus. I have experienced blessings and peace and joy almost constantly for the past eleven years. If you have not the same hope that I have, I suggest that you give your life to Christ. It is incredible to walk in his presence.

Because a little baby was born in Bethlehem many years ago and grew up to give his life for my sins, I am able to live in complete confidence of my salvation. That is the greatest blessing I can have.




Come, thou long-expected Jesus,
born to set thy people free;
from our fears and sins release us,
let us find our rest in thee.

Israel's strength and consolation,
hope of all the earth thou art:
dear desire of every nation,
joy of every longing heart.

Born thy people to deliver,
born a child, and yet a king,
born to reign in us for ever,
now thy gracious kingdom bring.

By thine own eternal Spirit
rule in all our hearts alone;
by thine all-sufficient merit
raise us to thy glorious throne.

Who are we?

So the question that has been thrown around several times in the last week around the Prudhomme household has been: "Who are we?"  Not literally, because we know our names and identities.  What I mean is that we have no idea why people have chosen to pour out their love on us.  We are two ordinary, incredibly flawed people who have been placed in the middle of extraordinary circumstances.  We are glad that people love us, but it just makes us scratch our heads!

Saturday was the much-anticipated Rodeo for Ryan, and the outpouring of love was intense.  Everywhere I looked, there was a sea of humanity.  There were over one thousand people that descended upon Paradise Ranch.  Everywhere there were people talking.  Laughing.  Serving.  Smiling.  Giving.  Playing.  Running.  Relaxing.  Rocking.  Singing.  Having fun.  And the diversity of people brought together was unbelievable - people that we know from all walks of life.  Port Huron, Lansing, Detroit, Grand Rapids, Kalamazoo, Jackson, Colorado Springs, Pittsburgh, Chicago, Indianapolis, and Dallas all had representation at the rodeo.  We didn't realize how many people care about us.  We kind of thought it would be big, but we didn't realize that it was going to be huge.

And the giving!  The final counts are in and they surpassed $50,000 but there are still donations coming in! FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLARS! Something that you may not know is that Ryan is not able to get life insurance.  Since he was diagnosed with PSC at the age of 20, he has not been insurable.  We tried very hard this past winter to find a policy that would cover someone with that disease, and we thought we had found one.  We sent in our premium and waited.  A couple of weeks later our insurance agent called us and said, "Um, I've never had this happen before but your life insurance policy was rejected, and the company actually rewrote their bylaws to specifically say that they would not cover someone with Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis."  Great.  The premium check was returned to us the same week that Ryan was diagnosed with cancer.  So the Lord taketh, and he giveth back.  We have this money now for medical expenses, and although we pray hard that it doesn't need to be used for life insurance, at least we have something now in case of that.  I don't think that it's by accident that God returned almost exactly 50k to us.

We don't know how to adequately express our gratitude.  Neither of us has ever been the recipient of a gift like this.  Neither of this has ever had something of this magnitude done for us.  A simple "thanks" seems insufficient, but it's a start.  Thank you for your time, volunteers.  Thank you for your many hours of phone calls, designing signs, getting volunteers, getting donations, and serving us, planning committee.  Thanks for coming out to the rodeo, especially those of you who had a far distance to drive or even fly.  Thanks so much for emptying your pockets and purses and giving to a family whom many of you barely know.  Thank you to the vendors and individuals who donated things ranging from handmade journals to live pigs to quilts to potatoes to vacations to jewelry - the list goes on and on!  Thank you so much for your words of encouragement and for your many prayers.  Thank you God for blessing this event, and by tangibly showing us how much it meant to You by holding back rain around Paradise Ranch while every other place within a mile of the ranch had downpours.

Who are we to deserve this much love?  We don't.  Neither do you.  None of us deserve the grace and love that we have been given.  Regardless, you have chosen to live out John 13:34-35:   ³⁴ "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. ³⁵ By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."

Today, I made a decision.

This decision was important for me.  I've been chewing on it all day long.

Nothing and no one is going to steal my joy.  This moment, this day, this time is precious.  And it is good, despite all circumstances.  My God, the Creator of the Universe is also the Great Physician.  I praise Him for His faithfulness and for His provision.  He is supremely sovereign, and He loves my husband far more than I ever could imagine loving him.  So I entrust this situation to Him and lay it at His feet.  May all of this be to His glory.


And now I'm going to go enjoy the grace that I've been given for this moment.  Tomorrow is taken care of.

Unexpected Blessings

"How are you doing?" (said with head cocked slightly sideways and a big sigh)

This is apparently the universal way to greet a person with cancer. To be completely honest with you, it was starting to get frustrating for me to be greeted this way. I would be cruising along in my day and not dwelling on this reality until somebody came around, threw their head to the side, and asked me how I'm doing.  Like that. That brings me right back to cancer land.

How am I doing? The answer is I'm doing incredibly well. I have felt great the last week and a half, I'm engaged with work, feeling like I'm fulfilling a purpose. Even though I have this appointment on Wednesday looming over our heads for the last two weeks, I have not been dwelling on what ifs and hypotheticals.

I'm not doing well because of anything I've done. If you asked us four months ago, "how would you respond if you were diagnosed stage four cancer?" We'd have said, "we'll be a million pieces lying on the ground." It is only the grace of God that is holding all the pieces together right now.

But that is the cool part. The joy of the Lord is my strength right now. In the face of extreme difficulty I feel an overwhelming peace and confidence in my Lord.

So every time somebody asks me, "how are you doing?" I have an awesome opportunity to tell them what God is doing in my life right now. Instead of being annoyed by this question, I'm actually looking forward to it now. Every time I get a chance to share what God's doing in my life, it is a blessing because it fills my cup.

Please lift up myself and my friends and family in your prayers the next couple days. This trip to Chicago is weighing heavily on many people around me. We're praying that the tests will show the cancer is shrinking or completely gone (you have not because you ask not). However good news does not mean I'm cured, and bad news does not mean I'm not able to be cured. This is all a journey that requires one step and a time. Each day brings new information and new decisions. Please pray that I could gain some weight. I'm on a pretty strict very healthy diet, and it is very difficult to gain weight back that I lost during the first week of each cycle.

Chemo? What Chemo?

Kendra and I arrived home yesterday night after a late night of chemo infusion Wednesday. We had a slow start coming home, hit some traffic and arrived home about 7 pm. I felt pretty decent all day on Thursday but that is how I felt last time as well. If the chemo went according to plan, then Friday should have been a bear of a day.

I woke up this morning so hopeful I would feel well. Grace Adventures' annual Golf Marathon was today. This is the first time I had decided to be a participant in helping to raise money for summer, to help impact children with Jesus Christ. I made that decision before cancer. Then when my chemo schedule lined out so that my worst treatment would be 2 days before hand, I figured there was no way I could golf today.

I raised money for the event nonetheless, and had a backup golfer fill my spot (thanks Mom). So I woke up this morning at 7 feeling pretty good. My wife made me go back to bed, but at 7:30 I couldn't sleep any more. So I begged, negotiated, whined, and manipulated, and finally got my wife to agree to drive me 1 hour to the golf event. (Kendra's edit: I never win these arguments.  It was either take him for a drive and carefully monitor his exertions, or else I would hear about it alllll day long.)

I didn't golf 100 holes like a lot of people did. I didn't even golf a full 9 I don't think. But I golfed a couple. I got outside and was able to be a part of the event. I felt pretty good most of the day. The drive home was rough, but I had a quick cat nap and now I'm better. My appetite is very weak and nausea comes and goes. Please pray I could start eating.

I'm so thankful that God blesses us with little things. I don't know if it mattered to Him that I made it to the Golf Marathon, but it mattered to me. It was a huge blessing and I'm very thankful. I can't wait for what tomorrow's little blessing may be.

P.S. If you're interested in making a donation towards the Golf Marathon, it's not too late!  Email me at ryan@graceadventures.org