Sunday, May 10, 2015

To the mamas that are doing it alone

Every day, the alarm goes off while it's still dark.  You sigh and hit snooze, but two minutes later you rise because who else is going to get these kids ready?  There is no time for sleeping in.

Breakfast, lunch packing, and making sure that the kids do not exit the house in pajama pants and a grubby tee shirt.  Drop off at school.  You go to work, where your schedule is full time because who else is going to earn money so that these kids can have the things they need and want?  Pick up the kids at daycare.  Groceries.  Dinner.  Homework.  Play with the kids.  Bedtime for them.  Try to watch a little TV but fall asleep because you're so dang tired.

Repeat, five days a week, 52 weeks a year.  Maybe on days six and seven you'll have some respite, but more than likely you'll be carting children around to soccer games or hauling them around to errands that you had no time to do during the week.  And church.  I love church, but why is it so difficult to get kids up and around and dressed in their best and out the door on a Sunday?  It's a stinkin' struggle bus every single weekend.

My dearest "only-parenting" mom, today let me give you an extra accolade.  Your strength, tenacity, fierce love, and provision for your children is worthy of respect and honor.  I know that you probably didn't choose this path.  I didn't either.  Death of a spouse, abandonment by the other parent - there are so many things in this life that we don't have control of, and yet despite the heartache, I see you there doing your best to choose your attitude and raise these littles to know a positive, loving worldview.  The most important thing for a child to learn resilience is to have a positive attachment to a stable adult, and I see you loving the heck out of those kids.  They know, they know deep in their hearts that you would lay down your life for them.

You are doing a fantastic job.  And even on the days where you're not doing a fantastic job (we all have them), I see that you want to do better.  That you want to learn from your mistakes, and grow, and do better by your kids.  I know you will, because I know that you have some pretty huge motivation in those beautiful kids of yours.

You are deserving of honor today, Only Parent Mom (and Only Parent Dads, too, of course, since Mother's Day should also recognize your dual role).  Know that the God who created you and knit you together made you especially for this significant role that you would have.  He loves you oh so much.  Lean into him - his grace is sufficient for the heavy burden that you carry every day.

Hats off, lady.  You are doing a fine job!  Happiest of Mother's Days to you.

My little and I - whom I only parented for two years.
He is a total joy!

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